Hello Dr. Nadia

“We are moving soon. In addition to changing environmental and town, my daughter 2 years (full Terrible Two) will be integrated into a new daycare. It’s been so many changes at once. So, how can I prepare so that it can adapt more easily to his new life? Thank you! A mother a little worried.

The answer of Dr. Nadia

The reactions of a child to a change may depend on several factors:

# The nature of change
# its adaptability;
# its ability to manage stress and emotions
# his temperament
# the quality of their attachment relationship with his parents
# the parents will exert efforts to be listening to children and help them adapt.

In your place I would not worry too much for the last point, since you care enough to adapt your daughter for me writing your question! For the first point, your situation seems pretty clear: the move will involve several important changes in the life of your daughter. Other items may vary from one child to another. even in two children of one family.

Since I do not know your daughter, you should ask how did she react to other changes she had to live his life so far. For example, how did she react when she fell from the breast or bottle to solid food, when you present new foods, when she meets new people, when it built its first daycare the end of your maternity leave? And when the change concerns, she responds positively to your attempts to reassure her? Your answers to these questions may give you a good idea of ​​its adaptability, its ability to manage stress and emotions, temperament and her attachment relationship with you.


Once you can better anticipate the reaction of your daughter, it is also necessary to know some practical tips to help him adjust to his new life and her new home. Bibliotherapy is a good way to prepare a child to an event coming up, or to help them adapt to an event that just occurred. This is a big word for just reading a story in which a character lives a situation similar to that of the child. Usually, the story has a positive outcome to help the child to dramatize the situation. In the case of your daughter, you might read a story in which a child lives with one move. This will help to positively anticipate the move and interact with you on the subject. Here are some suggestions for further reading on the subject.

Before you move, you could go for a walk with your daughter in her new neighborhood. The simple act of regularly see her future home, his future street, its future park could help him tame his new environment before it has to integrate. It’s the same for his future care. if the educator lies open to the idea, you could maybe make a few short visits (ten minutes) before the move, so your daughter to know her and with friends. You could also ask the teacher what time of day the group went to the park to get there together a few times before the move. Also, if your daughter is afraid of missing his old home, his former gamekeeper and his friends, you might prepare a little memory box with pictures of his room, the playroom, the kitchen, friends of the center and with small objects that remind him his old environment.

Finally, the most important thing is not to confront if she tells you she does not move or she does not like his new home. Often, when children respond well and that parents want all their heart that they are able to adapt, they tend to try to convince them of the positive aspects of change. I think it is better to show simply listening to the child by validating his emotions: “You know, I understand you. it’s normal to be afraid of change, to prefer your old home to new. ” Simply to feel understood and listened to soothe your daughter. Then it’s time that will allow it to mourn his former home and gradually discover the benefits of his new life.